A film from Yashraj banner, wow! Everybody waits for it, audiences and film fraternity. After all a yashraj film is a yashraj film. Other producers adjust their releases and give Yashraj a clean run. This time also same thing happened; Tashan was released with an expectation to be biggest blockbuster ever. I also went and saw the film “first day last show”, despite of getting 2 different seats for me and my friend.
As the film began and titles rolled out, my heart was jumping and my excitement was over the moon because Tashan has a dream cast of Akshay Kumar, Saif, Kareena, Anil Kapoor and a director who has written films like Dhoom and Dhoom 2. Finally the film began and I started to find a great story to unfold in front of my eyes. However, what I was seeing was some great locations, good styling, good clothes, indigestible stunts and that’s it. I pinched and told myself chu*** its just the beginning and the real story will start now. I was consoled for the moment. I started concentrating (in anticipation of a story) on jumping locations. without continuity, kareena’s dance, bikinis, zero size (zero sized clothes too), Saif’s moustaches, Anil Bhiaya’s crude English (which might persuade many to commit suicide) and Bachchan Pande’s (Akshay) Colgate white teeth. An idea he should start endorsing the toothpaste brand now. In between I also discovered a new route to Haridwar from Mumbai via Laddakh and Greece. What learning! Suddenly “the intervals” happened, I was shocked and could not stand up from seat as there was Fevicol on it. My friend came from other corner of the theatre, and after knowing my situation he tried consoling me by saying “ Picture abhi baaki hai mere dost”.
Just thinking about picture abhi bakki hai, I missed my favorite theatre Samosa for the first time ever. Reels were rolling again and scenes with no connections to each other were coming on the screen. There was a childhood love story of Akshay, there were Main Khiladi Tu Anadi inspired sequences between Akshay and Saif, there was Bhaiyaji’s (Anil Kapoor) cruelty, there was revenge seeking Kareena, there were action sequences from eighties hindi films to latest hollywood films, there were blasts and there were blah blah blah. Every other thing except for a story, a proper screenplay and an effort to make a decent film I found there. But by this time I ran out of my patience and started abusing my self for selecting to watch this film over IPL match and some faltu reality show on TV.
It was 12.45 in the night but picture abhi bhi baaki thi mere dosto. At that moment my mind decided to take over my heart and chose not to sacrifice my sleep over this torture which was never ending. After that what happened I don’t know, only thing I know that my friend came and woke me up. Thank god, the screen was blank and seats were empty, the only moment I felt happy in last 3 hours.
I find everyone lucky who could not watch this film because of tussle between Yashraj and multiplexes. They should sincerely thank multiplexwalas for saving their hard earned money.
A piece of advice for Chopra’s, please don’t take us for granted now. Only the name Yashraj Films will not work anymore.
Another advice for all of you seeking revenge from your enemies, buy and gift him /her tickets of “Tashan”.
Rating: 0 (generously)
